1.11 The Unexpected
This chapter is Rated R (Strong language)
Author’s note: Now that we finally get to meet Madeline’s mother, I finally added a family tree. Click HERE to view. 🙂 Please keep in mind that I haven’t added the pictures yet, but I will tomorrow. I’m too lazy to add them now. ROFL.
“I’m not interested in whatever your selling, sorry.” My mother waved a hand at me and started to shut the door in my face. I stepped forward quickly, holding the door open with my foot.
“I’m not selling anything. I’m Madeline.” I said quickly. “Drake.”
“Excuse me?” My mother said softly, her green eyes widening, her face extremely pale.
“Mom, who is this?” My sister asked puzzled, her brow furrowed as she stared at me like I had grown a second head. I stared back at my half-sister. She was the spitting image of my mother at a young age, except her eyes were a deep blue color that must have been passed down from her paternal side of the family. Welcome to the Twilight Zone, I thought my head spinning.
My mother was silent, her mouth agape, she looked like she wanted to run and hide. I could say the feeling was mutual. “Nothing Melody. Go check on your brother would you?” She said not taking her eyes off my face for a second. Melody looked back and forth between us like she knew there was more to the story.
Brother? My mind spun like a top, and my vision dimmed making me feel dizzy. I had a half-brother, and a sister? Never in a million years did I expect my mother to have anymore children. I had assumed in her dropping me off with her mother at one year of age, that she wasn’t the motherly type. How wrong I was? What else was I wrong about?
My mother laughed suddenly and narrowed her eyes at me. “Oh, now I know who you are, Madeline, our new cleaning lady. Why didn’t you say so?” Her green eyes met mine in an unspoken challenge.
My heart sunk like the Heart of the Ocean tossed off the balcony of the Titanic. The cleaning lady? This reunion wasn’t going the way I had planned it, that much was for sure.
Melody yawned looking bored, having lost all interest in me once she knew I was the hired help. I watched her turn around and walk back inside the spacious foyer, her pretty dress swishing around her hips as she walked. What a different life we lived, I couldn’t help but feeling a twinge of envy over my sister.
“The help!” I exclaimed glaring at my mother once the door shut. “Seriously?” Anger was a welcome feeling, it chased away the sadness caused by my mothers complete lack of interest in me. Once again, I was abandoned by her.
“Why are you here?” Melissa hissed at me looking mad enough to shoot bullets out of her eyes.
“Good question.” I spat. “I came because I thought you needed my help. Obviously I was wrong.” I said bitterly, feeling the tears building behind my eyelids threatening to spill over my cheeks.
“Would you keep your voice down?” Melissa hissed at me, grabbing my arm and tugging me away from the door.
Wouldn’t want your perfect children to hear us, I thought bitterly feeling like I could cry. Why was she so quick to abandon me, but so willing to keep her other children?
I followed her down the driveway. She pushed open the wooden gate leading us to a bench nestled amongst the roses. Smelling the roses filled me with a sense of nostalgia and made me miss home. I wonder if Melissa got her gardening skills from her mother, or if they were just for show.
She sat down and stared ahead, her arms crossed over her chest in a defensive manner. I sat beside her on the bench.
“Is it money you want?” Melissa snapped at me, taking me completely off guard.
“Money?” I yelled. “You think this is about money?”
“What else would it be about? You saw I was well off and now you want a piece.” She stared ahead, her lack of interest in me apparent.
“I don’t need your fucking money.” I leaned forward resting my elbows on my knees trying my best not to cry. “I’m here because I wanted to get to know my mother, I must be a fucking idiot, its obvious that you don’t give a shit about me, or even care about knowing a thing about me. I just want to know why…”
“Why what? You want to know why I gave you up? You want to hear the entire story to make yourself feel better, there isn’t much to tell.” Melissa said stonily.
“Why did you give me up?” I asked the question I’ve been dying to ask since I first learned about my mother. “And don’t tell me you weren’t ready to be a mother. How old is Melody? Eighteen? You must have been pregnant with her when you dropped me off with your mother. So why then? What was so horrible about me that you had to give me up, but could raise Melody?” I couldn’t help it, I began to cry, and I hated myself for it.
“You were better off.” Melissa said quietly, her voice barely that of a whisper. “Your father..” She started to stay.
“What about my father? You know who he is?”
“I don’t want to talk about your father….its complicated. And none of your business.”
“The hell it isn’t my business!” I yelled. “I have a right to know who my father is.”
“How much?” Melissa said, her expression flat and unreadable.
“Excuse me?” I asked shifting on the uncomfortable bench.
“How much will it cost for you to go away and get the hell out of my life. I’m a different person then I was back then. You have no right to be here. I’m married, and I have two children, and your going to ruin everything for me. I left you with my mother who I knew would raise you well, Isn’t that good enough for you? I should have just dropped you off at the shelter and never looked back. I should have known you would try to find me some day. That you would try to ruin everything for me!”
My head swam from the hurt her words caused, and I felt my face pale considerably. Of all the scenarios I had imagined in my head about my mother, in every single one, I had never imagined her to be so cruel and heartless.
Jumping up from the bench I whirled to face her. I wanted to look into her eyes and see her expression, to make her hurt as much as I was hurting.
“You don’t deserve to be a mother.” I spat like my words were poison. “Your mother, my grandmother, was ten times the mother that you could ever hope to be. She worked two jobs to support me, and gave up so much to make sure I was well cared for, that I could never want for a thing! She loved you. She never gave up searching for you, because that’s what a mother does.”
“And your point is…?” Melissa just looked annoyed. It was clear she just didn’t give a shit about anyone but herself, she only cared about protecting her own interests, and making sure her cushy well off suburban life remained intact.
“Does your husband know that you used to be a whore?” I spat, feeling my green eyes flash.
Melissa shifted uncomfortably on the bench, her face creasing with a frown. Ahhh, I thought triumphantly. Finally something that rattles her cage.
“That was a long time ago.” She said quietly, looking up to meet my eyes boldly. “And you have no right bringing that up. Now if that is all, its time for you to leave, or I’m going to call the cops, and have you arrested for trespassing.”
“You’re a bitch.” I said, shaking my head sadly. “I don’t know why I even bothered looking for you. I should have just assumed you were dead and called it good. I can’t believe that you were born to someone as caring and decent as your mother.” I turned around to leave, before I did something I would regret.
“And I should have gotten an abortion.” Melissa laughed from the bench.
I paused, my hands tightening into fists, my nails digging painfully into my palms. For a minute I could clearly imagine myself punching her in the face. Then I realized my grandmother raised me better than that, and I quickly walked away before she could see my tears fall.
As Madeline stormed away, she didn’t notice a shocked Melody step away from the window overhearing the entire exchange between the two…
I ran across the grass as fast as my legs could carry me, the tears streaming down my face. All I could think about was Mika. If I could just get to the car without breaking down Mika would be there to pick up the pieces, and be there to put me back together again.
I couldn’t believe my mother, if I could even call her that. A mother was someone who made you chicken noodle soup when you were sick, and loved you more than life itself, who would do anything just to see you smile. Do anything to protect you, to keep you safe. This woman was none of those things….she was cold, and cruel, she was nothing like me. Riley was right. This was a mistake. I should have listened to him!
“Wait!” I heard a voice call from behind me. I whirled around to see Melody running towards me.
“Nothing to see here, I’m just the maid.” I laughed bitterly.
“Oh save it. I heard everything.” Melody said with a slight smirk on her pink slicked lips.
I frowned wearily. “Come to rub it in a little?” I asked pinching the bridge of my nose to stem away the headache that was beginning to build behind my eyes. Tension headaches were the worst!
“Is it true?” Melody asked. “You’re really my sister?”
“Well half actually.” I admitted, seeing no reason to lie, after the way I had been treated by my own mother, I felt no inclination to protect her secrets.
“Wow.” Melody said simply, her eyes widened in shock. “How come you didn’t take the money?”
“I could give a shit less about your families money.” I said, slightly insulted. What was it with this family and money?
“She’s not happy you know.” Melody smirked. “Her and my dad, they fight all the time. It’s the drugs. I think she’s using again.”
“I really don’t care anymore.” I said honestly. It was the truth, I stopped caring about my mother the minute she told me she wished she would have aborted me. “Your mother wants nothing to do with me, so why should I care? She abandoned me, you heard.” I started to turn away, eager to get away from this crazy family and all its drama.
Without another word I spun around, eager to get back to Mika, and get away from my mother’s house of hell. I just wanted to go home and forget this day, to pretend my mother didn’t exist. Maybe I could trick myself into pretending she died a long time ago, and pretend the mother in my head loved me enough to make sure I was cared for by the only person she trusted in life.
“She’s not all that bad you know.” Melody called out. “She’s made some mistakes, but she’s a good person deep down…”
“How great for you and your brother.” I said frostily walking away. I just didn’t care…Not anymore.
“Oh Madeline, Are you ok?” Mika breathed, reaching out to wipe away a tear from my cheek, as I threw myself into the passenger seat sobbing.
“No.” I choked out. “Just drive ok. Get me out of here.”
I closed my eyes and lay back against the headrest, as Mika pulled away from the curb.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Mika asked glancing at me as we headed back towards town.
“There is nothing to tell. Absolutely nothing.” I laughed, loudly, and started hiccupping. Mika looked at me strangely, I couldn’t blame him, I probably looked insane, like I had lost my mind. “Oh one thing though, I have a half-brother and sister.” I laughed again. You’re losing it Madeline, big time.
Mika raised an eyebrow. “Is that good?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” I sighed, exhaustion setting in.
With a screech of the tires, and a crank of the wheel Mika pulled into the parking lot at the park and stopped the car.
“What are you doing?” I asked rubbing my tired eyes. “I’m not up for a picnic.”
“Normally I’d give you your space-I’m not a pushy guy, but I can see that you’re hurting, and I can’t take seeing you like this.”
Mika opened his car door, and I followed, somewhat crabbily along the tall grasses leading to the pond. Normally I’d be overjoyed to be in such a romantic setting on such a beautiful day with Mika, but not today. I just wanted to be alone.
He turned to face me, putting his hands on my shoulders and looking into my eyes. He brushed a strand of my hair that had fallen out of my updo, sweeping it up and over my eyes. His finger that stroked my cheek was gentle, and his eyes looked concerned.
“I take it the visit with your mother didn’t go as planned?” He asked softly.
“No, no it didn’t.” I said surprised to feel my eyes well up with tears once more. Hadn’t I already cried enough? I was shocked I was able to even produce anymore tears. “She’s awful. She said she wished she had gotten an abortion.”
“I’m sorry, Madeline. She doesn’t deserve to have a daughter like you.”
I laughed. “If you say so.” I began to cry in earnest now.
I needed to feel something. Anything. Other than this crushing, overwhelming disappointment and anguish. I wanted to feel loved. Needed. Wanted. I stepped across the empty space between Mika and I, and grabbed him, raising my lips to his. His familiar taste and smell invaded my senses, overwhelming me.
Mika pulled back, looking guilty, his face full of remorse. “We can’t.” He said simply. He took a step back, breaking my heart for the second time that day.
“Why the hell can’t we?” I choked out, my face ten shades of red.
“It’s not right. Madeline, I know you’re hurting, and I want to kiss you. I want that more than anything in the world, but until you break things off with Riley, I just can’t. I’m not that guy.”
“Well thanks for nothing.” I choked out, knowing that I was bitter and angry, and lashing out, but I didn’t care.
“Madeline…” Mika stepped forward, trying to hug me, I held up my hands and pushed him away.
“Just go.” I spat. “Get the hell out of here.”
Mika gave me one last sad look, then turned and walked away leaving me standing by the pond alone.
Alone at last, I fell to my knees by pond, dissolving into tears that burned down my cheeks. Mika didn’t want me, hell my own mother wished I was never born, and my life was falling apart. I stared across the open field in the direction Mika had disappeared wishing more than anything to see him walking back towards me with his lopsided smile. I had probably pushed him away for good, and now he would want nothing to do with me. I was truly alone…
Riley was right, about everything. He warned me that finding my mother was going to cause me nothing but grief and heartache, and I wasn’t looking forward to hearing the words ‘I told you so’, even if I did deserve it.
I straightened up wiping the tears away from my eyes, and with a grim look of determination, began walking towards town…